Monday, June 12, 2023

How To Give and Take Constructive Criticism




Let’s face it, it can be hard to give or receive criticism no matter how it is delivered. But getting comfortable with offering and receiving practical, constructive criticism is fundamental to our professional development. 


When presented correctly, it can be a helpful tool for leaders and peers to help each other deliver better results, find motivation, and strengthen relationships.


So how can you learn to take criticism well and get better at delivering it to others? 


In this article, we'll discuss the art of constructive criticism. We’ll break down what it is, how it compares to destructive criticism, practical strategies to give constructive criticism and receive it well, and what to avoid in both cases.


What is constructive criticism?

Constructive criticism is a feedback method that offers specific, actionable recommendations for change and improvement. Good constructive feedback facilitates positive outcomes and creates a positive working environment. It also provides a safe space where a person feels secure enough to ask questions, seek help, and share ideas.


Constructive criticism vs. destructive criticism: what’s the difference?

The big difference between constructive and destructive criticism lies in how the comments are delivered. 


While constructive criticism focuses on building up the other person, destructive criticism focuses on the negative. The feedback can be vague and often lacks guidance or support. 


Constructive criticism

Constructive criticism is clear, direct, honest, and easy to implement. It provides specific examples and actionable suggestions for positive change. This type of feedback also highlights ways the recipient can make positive improvements in their behavior to minimize future problems.


Deconstructive criticism

Destructive criticism, on the other hand, focuses solely on the problem. This kind of feedback offers no encouragement, help, or support for improvement. Despite the deliverer’s intentions, it often lowers morale and reduces confidence.


Benefits of constructive criticism

Unlike deconstructive or negative criticism, constructive criticism builds trust and provides an opportunity for both parties to grow. Two key elements of constructive criticism’s success are context and actionable advice. 


This kind of feedback gives the recipient context around their areas of improvement, which is crucial for understanding why the feedback is being offered.


Supporting the additional context with actionable steps and suggestions for how to improve build trust between both parties. This combination also opens the door to conversation, collaboration, and professional development.


The role of empathy and constructive criticism

But there is more to effective negative feedback than expressing a negative in a positive light. The key to success is to make your feedback sound encouraging and to keep the other person’s perspective in mind.


By remaining empathetic to their circumstances, you’ll have an easier time delivering critical feedback in a beneficial and constructive way.


How to give constructive criticism

1. Offer a "feedback sandwich"

This popular method of giving constructive criticism is often used in Toastmasters and the corporate environment. 


The “feedback sandwich” got its name because of its structure. You wedge your criticism between an opening and an ending (like a burger wedged between two buns) using the PIP analogy, which stands for Positive-Improvement-Positive.


With PIP, you can break down your feedback into three segments.


Example:


“I liked the depth of content you covered in your presentation. However, you can improve the design and color palette of your slides. The ones you used were a bit hard to process and didn’t do justice to your content. 


Having said that, I really like the overall flow and feel of it. With a few tweaks in the areas I’ve mentioned, I think you have a winner. Please reach out to the design team for some tips, and they will help you take things to the next level. I’m excited to see the end product!”


Segment 1: Open with positive feedback


Start by focusing on the recipient’s strengths and highlight what you like about what they have done. 


Example: “I liked the depth of content you covered in your presentation.”


Segment 2: Sandwich the area of improvement in the middle


Provide the criticism by focusing on what they need to improve on.


Example: “However you can improve the design and color palette of your slides. The ones you used were a bit hard to process and didn’t do justice to your content.”


Segment 3: End on a positive note


Finally, round off the feedback with an encouraging comment that reiterates the positive statement you made at the start. Also, highlight the positive results they can expect if they accept your critique as it helps build trust and confidence.


Example: “Having said that, I really like the overall flow and feel of it. With a few tweaks in the areas I’ve mentioned, I think you have a winner. Please reach out to the design team for some tips, and they will help you take things to the next level. I’m excited to see the end product!”


2. Be specific with your feedback

The more specific and detailed your feedback is, the more actionable it will be. Do not make vague, blanket statements. Instead, list out objections or behavior changes you want to see in detail. This step makes it easier for the other person to address and change things.


Here is an example of vague vs. specific feedback:


Vague Criticism: “Hi Julie, I wish you would start writing some articles on marketing.”

Specific criticism: “Hi Julie, I would love for you to write a marketing article on how to identify and communicate with your target audience. Please let me know when you start and if you need any further suggestions.”

The vague comment is very broad and confusing because marketing is a very general topic. In contrast, the specific comment provides clarity and makes the task more actionable because it is so precise. 


Using this approach provides employees and peers clarity. The better they understand the request, the less uncertain or anxious they will feel about the job and how they should complete it.


3. Give recommendations for ways to improve

The main reason for giving feedback is to help the person improve. Remember, good feedback is a gift! 


Giving recommendations on what the person can do to improve has a range of benefits, including the following:


A better understanding of you and your expectations

The ability to align on expectations

It provides a powerful call to action, giving the receiver a plan of action 

It will also help them act on what you have discussed rather than procrastinate.


Example:


Weak recommendation: “The presentation is too long. Make it shorter.”

Strong recommendation: “The presentation can easily be reduced from 30 minutes to 20 minutes if you limit one example to each point. This will make it more concise and impactful. At the moment, you have two to three examples per point which detracts from the main message.” 

The first recommendation is not very helpful because it lacks clarity and specificity. The second example is better because it is very specific and demonstrates your point of view to the person by explaining your rationale.


4. Avoid making assumptions

Give recommendations only when you know the facts about that specific topic or person. Avoid any temptation to jump to conclusions and observe instead. 


Wrong assumptions can come across as personal attacks, and they can cause distress in the workplace.


Example:


Criticism: “The presenter was a bit hesitant, and the session didn’t really flow.”

Assumption: “The presenter doesn’t have any workshop experience.”

This assumption is not necessarily true. Experienced presenters can be nervous when facilitating workshops, especially when presenting in a new environment and to a new audience.


For example, assuming that someone is inexperienced just because they appear slightly hesitant can hurt morale and reduce psychological security in the workplace. 


It is also counter-productive as the feedback recipient would likely discount any criticism that followed even if it was accurate.


13 tips for giving constructive feedback

The art of giving constructive criticism is a skill that requires practice and empathy. Here are 13 guidelines you can use to foster a culture of growth, improvement, and mutual respect, when giving constructive feedback.


Focus on behavior, not the person

Focus on observable actions or behaviors rather than identity, personality, or motivations. This helps separate the feedback from personal judgments.

Consider giving real-time criticism

Feedback is more effective when given promptly and while the events are still fresh in everyone’s minds. You don’t always have to wait for your next one-on-one meeting or 360-review cycle.


Keep timing in mind

If you or the recipient is coming out of a heated discussion, for instance, wait until the dust settles to keep the conversation constructive.


Be mindful of emotions

It is beneficial to give feedback when the other person is ready to hear it. Avoid offering feedback when the person is not able to hear potentially unpleasant news.

Avoid workplace gossip

Workplace gossip is detrimental to everyone. It erodes trust at all levels. Keep all feedback between yourself and the recipient, and ensure that they are the first to know.

Focus on the situation, not the person

Good constructive criticism should focus on the behavior you want to see more of rather than what you observed and did not like.

Use the “l” language technique (I think, I suggest, etc.)

This tactic helps the feedback recipient understand that the criticism is about the situation and not about them as a person. It also confirms your point of view and lets the recipient know how you see the situation.

Remain objective

Focus more on objective points rather than subjective opinions. Rather than saying “I don’t like it,” state the specific things you do not like (e.g., the purple lettering on a yellow background made my eyes hurt).

Keep communication clear

Break your feedback down into key points or themes for better clarity before sharing it point by point. Refrain from giving your feedback in one big chunk. 

Give specific examples for each feedback point

Point out one or two exact situations where the person has displayed the behaviors you want them to change. This helps to (a) illustrate what you mean and (b) raise the person’s awareness of behavioral patterns that they may not realize.

Offer actionable solutions

Alongside identifying areas for improvement, suggest practical steps or strategies that can help the recipient address the concerns effectively.

Maintain a constructive tone

Use language that is respectful, supportive, and non-confrontational. Frame your feedback in a positive light, emphasizing growth and development.

Leave space for questions

Giving constructive criticism can make both parties uncomfortable. And comments can be misunderstood or misinterpreted. Be sure to leave time and space for questions to ensure everyone is on the same page.


What to avoid when giving constructive criticism


Now that we know some strategies to give constructive feedback, here are things to avoid.


Avoid personal attacks: Keep your feedback focused on actions, not the person. Refrain from using derogatory language or making disparaging remarks.

Don't make assumptions: Base your feedback on observable facts and specific examples rather than assumptions or generalizations. This ensures your criticism remains grounded and fair.

Avoid overwhelming with feedback: Focus on a few key areas for improvement to prevent the recipient from feeling overwhelmed or discouraged.

Don't withhold praise: If there are positive aspects of the individual's performance, acknowledge and appreciate them. Balancing constructive criticism with genuine praise creates a more supportive environment.

How to receive constructive criticism

When the tables turn, and you’re the one on the receiving end of criticism, how do you cope with the situation? 


Do you know how to accept the feedback and back off the defensive? 


Receiving criticism from a co-worker, a colleague, or someone you don’t fully trust can be challenging. However, it is helpful to remember that accurate and constructive feedback can also come from flawed sources.


Here is a 7-step process on how to receive criticism with tact and grace:


Stop your first reaction. Stay calm and try not to react at all. Maintain a calm demeanor.

Remember the benefits of getting feedback and try to understand the motivation and perception of your criticizer. 

Be a good listener. Listen closely and focus on understanding the other person’s comments and perspective.

Say thank you. You don’t have to agree with the feedback, but expressing gratitude demonstrates that you recognize the efforts of your colleagues who are working towards your improvement.

Take time for reflection. Allow yourself time to process the feedback and consider how you can apply it to improve your performance. Reflecting on the feedback fosters self-awareness and facilitates growth.

Ask questions to deconstruct the feedback and share your perspective. Get more clarity by asking for specific examples, acknowledging the non-disputable part of the feedback, and asking for concrete solutions.

Request time to follow up. If it’s a more significant issue, ask for a follow-up meeting to ask more questions and agree on the next steps.

This pause will also give you time to process the feedback, seek advice from others and think about solutions. Ideally, you’ll also articulate what you will do in the future and thank the person again for the feedback.


5 things to avoid when receiving constructive criticism

If you are on the receiving end of constructive criticism, don’t throw it away. Insight from a trusted, objective source about your work, management style, or how you’re showing up is priceless.


You want to keep it coming, and that means not reacting in a way that scares the giver off or makes them less willing to give you feedback in the future.


To keep the feedback coming, avoid these 5 reactions:


Do not react with defensiveness and anger

Do not attack the person giving the feedback

Do not interrupt or talk over the person when they are giving the feedback

Avoid analyzing or questioning the person’s assessment initially

Avoid engaging in a debate or a combative response

Remember, it’s not easy to give or receive feedback, but we hope that this article has equipped you with the tools to feel more positive in your ability to do this well.

Before You Start an Exercise Program



Before you start an exercise program, there are a few questions to ask yourself to determine whether you should see your doctor first.

Question Yourself

Your first step is to ask yourself how active you want to be. This may sound like a silly question—you’re probably planning on doing whatever you’re capable of, whether that’s a slow walk around the block or a vigorous step class. But if you’re of a certain age or have certain cardiovascular risk factors, you may need to see your physician before beginning a program that involves vigorous (as opposed to moderate) aerobic activity.

Here’s how exercise intensities are typically defined:

Low-to-Moderate

This is an intensity that can be sustained relatively comfortably for a long period of time (about 60 minutes). This type of exercise typically begins slowly, progresses gradually and usually isn’t competitive in nature.

Vigorous

This is an intensity that is high enough to significantly raise both your heart and breathing rates, and is usually performed for about 20 minutes before fatigue sets in.

Are you planning to participate in vigorous activities and are a man over 45 or a woman over 55? You should receive a medical exam first. The same is true for individuals of any age with two or more coronary artery disease risk factors. If you’re unsure if this applies to you, check with your physician.

More Questions

Now that you’ve made it through the first questions, there are a few more to answer. A “yes” to any one of the following questions means you should talk with your doctor, by phone or in person, before you start an exercise program. Explain which questions you answered ‘’yes’’ to and the activities you are planning to pursue.

  • Have you been told that you have a heart condition and should only participate in physical activity recommended by a doctor?
  • Do you feel pain (or discomfort) in your chest when you do physical activity? When you are not participating in physical activity? While at rest, do you frequently experience fast, irregular heartbeats or very slow beats?
  • Do you ever become dizzy and lose your balance, or lose consciousness? Have you fallen more than twice in the past year (no matter what the reason
  • Do you have a bone or joint problem that could worsen as a result of physical activity? Do you have pain in your legs or buttocks when you walk?
  • Do you take blood pressure or heart medications?
  • Do you have any cuts or wounds on your feet that don’t seem to heal?
  • Have you experienced unexplained weight loss in the past six months?
  • Are you aware of any reason why you should not participate in physical activity?

If you answered “no” to all of these questions, and you passed the first round of questions, you can be reasonably sure that you can safely take part in at least a moderate-intensity physical-activity program.

But again, if you are a man over 45 or a woman over 55 and want to exercise more vigorously, you should check with your physician before getting started.

By taking the time to evaluate if you are ready to start exercising, you’ve planted yourself firmly on the path to better health and fitness.

5 Ways to Eat More Mediterranean


I see a lot of fad diets come and go. A lot of them feel more like a punishment than a doable lifestyle (and have flimsy-at-best science to back them up).

But the Mediterranean Diet is the real deal. Instead of being a diet you go on and off, it’s a pattern of eating -- and there’s a lot of evidence to support its positive effects, like lower risk of cardiovascular disease and diabetes.

Even better, you don’t have to count calories, endure lists of “foods to avoid,” or seek out pricey ingredients. Many of the most-used Mediterranean ingredients are pantry staples including canned tuna, canned beans, canned tomatoes, olives, pasta, potatoes, onions, whole grains, plain yogurt, frozen fruits and vegetables.

Here are five simple ways to start eating more Mediterranean today:

Don't cut out carbs

So many diets slash carbohydrates, but healthy foods like whole grains, beans, fruit, and vegetables contain carbs too. Those foods pack antioxidants, fiber, vitamins, minerals, and energy. Even white pasta provides some of the longest-lasting energy.

Don’t overcook your pasta, she says. Water-logged pasta has a higher glycemic index (which means you're hungry again quicker) than perfectly cooked 'al dente' pasta. So follow the box directions closely.

Cook with olive oil

Olive oil is a cornerstone of the Mediterranean Diet. It contains monounsaturated fats, a kind that’s been linked to lower total cholesterol level and lower “bad” LDL cholesterol.

With so many choices, which kind should you buy? We recommended looking for an extra-virgin olive oil that fits your budget, as it’s the staple fat used in the bulk of Mediterranean recipes.

Season with citrus

Instead of reflexively reaching for the salt shaker, a squeeze of lemon can add lots of sodium-free flavor. This pop of flavor may add the 'sparkle' that you're looking for, without more salt. Citrus zest (the outer layer of the peel) delivers lots of flavor too. Use a microplane or simple vegetable grater to remove it.

Eat fish twice a week

Higher-fat fish like salmon and mackerel contain heart-healthy omega-3 fats, but all kinds of fish (and shellfish) are healthy protein sources. If you’re intimidated by cooking fish, try microwaving it. This way it's moist and hard to overcook, and fillets are usually done in less than 2 minutes. 

Here’s how: Place fish in a glass dish, add a few squirts of lemon juice, cover loosely with plastic wrap, and microwave in 30-second increments until done.

Include more yogurt

Start thinking of this healthy, fermented food as something beyond a sweet breakfast or snack, but also a savory ingredient you add to meals. Ball recommends choosing plain, 2% Greek yogurt. Adding a swirl of tangy yogurt to spicy, veggie-forward, or meaty dishes makes all the flavors pop.

Here’s a trick for making a healthy mayo swap: Combine 1/2 cup of Greek yogurt with 1 tablespoon of extra virgin olive oil and 1/4 teaspoon of salt. Use it anywhere you would use mayonnaise, like egg salad, as a dip with raw veggies, over fish, or drizzled over roasted potatoes.

Eat veggies at every meal (even breakfast!)

Veggies aren’t just for dinner. Focus on what veggies you can add to every meal, including breakfast (like greens and tomatoes in omelets). And remember that beans are veggies too. We like to mash canned beans with avocado, a little olive oil, salt and pepper, and then spread it on toast for breakfast.

How Massage Therapy Helps Reduce Stress




We’ve all felt stress manifesting in our bodies: tight shoulders, stiff necks, and aching backs.

Ouch! Just thinking about it is painful 

Fortunately, massage therapy helps reduce stress in your everyday life.

Measures of oxygen consumption, blood pressure, and salivary cortisol levels were all lower after only 10 to 15 minutes of massage therapy in controlled studies.

Stress can cause you to clench your jaw or grind your teeth, leading to headaches.

It can also lead to poor sleep patterns where you toss and turn and don’t get enough restful R.E.M. sleep.

Regular massage therapy is like regular car maintenance. Your body’s “tune-up” will help you:

  • Release muscle tension
  • Improve circulation for more optimal body function
  • Improve your mood (which can then, in turn, make you more motivated to get back to the activities that are mentally and physically stimulating)
  • Improve sleep quality

All these are important to restore your body to its highest functionality and allow you to reset so you can deal with the upcoming tasks and to-dos head-on.

Stress Strain Syndrome and How it Affects the Body

 

11 Categories of Stress

Stress can be placed in 11 categories — these categories should not be placed in any special order. Their effect on the individual is dependent upon factors such as age, gender and innate energy of that individual.


The Categories Are:


Infections

Surgery

Injury

Immunological reactions to drugs

Inoculations

Allergies

Overexertion

Strong emotions – death, divorce, loss of a job, etc.

Malnutrition — poor diet &/or poor digestion

Pregnancy

Exposure to extremes – hot or cold

Gravity


When stress goes beyond the elastic limits of the body it causes many problems. If a muscle or group of muscles is overworked, they become tense and too exhausted to relax and rest. This state we refer to as strain. Strain or tense muscles cause problems in the body because they squeeze down on capillaries and impede blood flow. 

These tense muscles also interfere with normal lymphatic function and trap lactic acids, or metabolic wastes, in cell spaces. This tension on nerves can cause pain as well as trapped body toxins.

Strain also interferes with normal muscle function, thus making the muscle weaker. As we try to perform our usual tasks with muscle strain, the muscles fatigue more quickly. As fatigue sets in, it causes more muscle strain. As the process continues, muscle groups become strained and fatigued. The body then becomes distorted and more strain and compensating distortion is manifest.

This process, if allowed to continue, soon results in exhaustion of these muscle groups. This state also affects organs and glands. Exhaustion is synonymous with pain and disease. We refer to disease as dis-ease — the body against itself.

Stress, when it goes beyond our limits, causes fatigue. If we continue pushing past fatigue by refusing to take the time to rest, we cause permanent tension — or strain. This strain is a permanent shortening of important postural muscles. Of course, a permanent shortening of a postural muscle always causes a pulling of the skeletal structure from its normal position — distortion.

Distortion is the body twisted from a normal postural position. If the body is pulled from its normal postural position it becomes twisted out of its center of gravity. When this occurs, the body would fall to the ground unless opposing muscles tightened and twisted the body back over its center of gravity. Thus, the body will remain balanced over its center of gravity and has overcome the distortion that would make it fall. 

Now however, we have another distortion process – compensating distortion. This means that in order to remain erect, the body must compensate for the original distortion. Both of these distortion processes increase the fatigue syndrome. This then, increases until exhaustion sets in. Exhaustion means exactly what the word implies – the energies of the muscle groups involved have become exhausted to the point that there is no energy left for them to function properly. Exhaustion is synonymous with pain and dis-ease. Disease means that the body is against itself. Processes have been set in place within the body that allow disease and illness to begin, that cause chronic pain and dramatically impede normal function of the body. In fact, research is showing more and more evidence that virtually all disease syndromes can be traced to a causative factor — that factor is stress that has gone far beyond the body’s elastic limit for a prolonged period of time.

It is when muscle strain occurs that the body can get into trouble. Muscle tension keeps blood from circulating normally into the tissues and won’t allow normal lymphatic function. Thus, metabolic wastes remain trapped in the muscle. These wastes are toxic to the tissue and cause pain. In the strained condition, the muscle is left tense, filled with trapped waste and unable to accept a fresh supply of oxygenated blood. The lack of oxygen causes pain and the lack of proper nutrients in the tissue causes the cells of the muscle to degenerate. Degeneration simply implies that, instead of continuing to regenerate and remain strong, the tissues are degenerating and becoming weaker. Thus the disease process is begun.

That’s the reason that the massage therapist/body worker is so effective when working on clients with any type of overwork or injury. Our specialty is working on muscle tissue, carefully bringing about relaxation. With relaxation come the true qualities of healing. When the muscle tissue is relaxed, blood is allowed to flow unimpeded to those tissues. If our diet has been carefully planned, that blood will be filled with all of the nutrients necessary for healing and regeneration of body tissues. And, of course, the blood stream will also be carrying with it oxygen. Oxygen is necessary for utilization of nutrients at the cellular level.